Bluetrait

It has come to my attention that a certain company has been successfully importing illegal terrorist weapons into Australia. Some of these weapons have unfortunately fallen into the hands of a seriously evil terrorist. These weapons come in all shapes and sizes. The latest of equipment can be found in certain model “Laptops”. These laptops contain the deadly exploding iBattery.   

In an attempt to cover up their actions this company has announced a fake recall of these iBatteries.

Unfortunately it is very hard to detect the dangerous iBattery as the detonation is completely automatic and spontaneous. Unlike their older model iBattery which can be found in a product called the iPod.

The iPod device requires a washing machine and screw driver to successfully detonate.

It is also thought that this company has created another weapon, under the code name “Airport Extreme”. This device can be found secretly hidden under the keyboard of late model iBooks. It is thought that this device maybe a biological weapon that is used to cause cancer. It is also possible that it could be used to cause extreme conditions in airports!